Friday, October 7, 2011

Who (or What) Comes First?

Mother. Caregiver.  Breadwinner.  Homemaker.  Runner.  Who (or what) comes first?

First and foremost, I am the only daughter of my dear parents.

If and when my services are needed by my father and my children at the same time, my role as a hands-on mom takes the back seat.

My kids know that their grandfather is almost 87, and they understand my predicament. 

One time, Gio saw how I devoted my time in assisting his Lolo that he remarked:  "Lolo is becoming helpless every day.  I'm happy I won't be taking care of you, the way you're taking care of Lolo.  Because  I'm sure you'll still be running 'til you're 100." (Well, I just hope he's right!)

I'm a single parent.  Naturally, I should be earning enough to send my children to school and provide for their needs. 

When my husband and I separated, I asked my mother if she could resign from her job and take care of her grandchildren for me to work full-time.  She was 68 at that time.  Gio was almost 5, Eia was only 2 1/2.

Without even giving it a serious thought, my mother impulsively answered:  "Ako na lang ang magtrabaho.  Ikaw na lang ang mag-alaga sa mga anak mo, pati na sa tatay mo."

Yup.  That was the arrangement.  In theory, at least. 

I couldn't just let my mother carry all the financial burden in our family so I took the licensure examinations in Life and Non-Life insurance and thank God I passed.  I also put up a small business to augment the family income but had to close early this year because I simply couldn't be in 4 places at the same time.

Sometimes it drives me nuts to balance everything that I need to do.  I want to help more people plan their future. I want to keep the house clean and tidy,  I want to be always around to fulfill my father's needs,  I want to be there when my children need me.  I want to inspire more people to run.  I want to be a catechist and teach young children about Jesus, hopefully molding them to work for the common good.  I want to train and run the marathon again.  I want to be an active member of CFC's Handmaids of the Lord, providing comfort and solace to single mothers like me. 

How about you?  Are you torn between 2 or 3 or even 4 roles that you have to fulfill?  How do you cope with the dilemma?


  1. Hi Nora,
    You are very amazing.
    I am glad I have met you.


  2. Same here, Joy! Still waiting for your text...

  3. Hi Nora, we don't have to worry on all these things. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding.God is our great is not for us to worry on the things of this world. Seek Christ, listen to His voice and obey and be confident that he will take charge of all your concerns.

  4. Yes, Bro J. If not for my trust in Him, I wouldn't have survived through it all.