Is Your Mind in Remarkable Shape? (#6)

According to Jordan Cooper: “If you’re over 65 and can still remember these 12 life events, your mind is in remarkable shape.” 

We have tackled the 5 life events in the previous posts. We are now in #6: A NATIONAL OR GLOBAL MOMENT AND WHERE YOU WERE

“The ‘Where were you when…?’ question. If you can place yourself—kitchen radio, dorm lounge, the passenger seat at a red light—your temporal and contextual memory are in sync. You don’t need to remember the date; remembering YOUR POSITION in the world when history knocked is the magic.”

I do remember the dates so here goes:

Feb 21, 1986: With all my thesis drafts rejected one after another, I decided to take an indefinite break in Pampanga. I brought my files/folders with me and left CRC.

Feb. 22, 1986: I was enjoying my swim alone in the pool, oblivious of an ongoing Press Conference in Camp Aguinaldo that would change the course of Philippine History.

Feb. 23, 1986: After a refreshing sleep, I woke up hearing the voices of PC Chief Fidel V Ramos and Defense Minister Jesus P Enrile over the radio. For a while I thought I was still asleep and only dreaming that a civil war was about to erupt in the country. Both of them defected from the Marcos Cabinet and pleaded for help from the innocent civilians to support them. What followed was the appeal of Cardinal Sin for the people to unite and go to Camp Aguinaldo and Camp Crame to protect those who turned their backs from the Marcos Administration. Hundreds of thousands of unarmed Filipinos heeded the call and flocked to EDSA (Epifanio Delos Santos Avenue). Armor trucks of Marcos followers were stopped by civilians by offering them food and drinks instead of bombarding them with bullets. Nuns led the rosary brigades in front of the terrifying tanks.

Feb. 24, 1986: I was jolted by the commanding voice of my father to lift my butt up my bed and join the demonstrations happening in Metro Manila. I knew he wouldn’t stop nagging me with his piercing words “what would you say to your grandchild someday when he asks you where were you during the EDSA REVOLUTION?” After breakfast, I left with my knapsack filled with water and assorted snacks because I knew the bus would be taking the longest route back to Pasig. NLEX (North Luzon EXpressway) was locked down to prevent the Marcos loyalists to enter Metro Manila.

As expected, it was almost dark when I arrived in CRC. My friends couldn’t believe I managed to sneak in from Pampanga to Pasig. I just matter-of-factly told them “if there’s a will, there’s a way.” We had a quick dinner then proceeded to Camp Atienza where we kept vigil. It was the only remaining military camp that has not yet joined the Opposition. 

Feb. 25, 1986: At the crack of dawn, military troops from Camp Atienza marched their way towards the gate to unite with the waiting civilians. It was a festive moment! Men in uniform and ordinary citizens hugging and embracing each other. We were crying and laughing at the same time.

I was in Libis, Quezon City during the triumph of the People Power Revolution. Democracy was restored in the Philippines without any casualty. This national phenomenon eventually became a global sensation. Filipinos showed the world that a non-violent Revolution is possible to end a 20-year Dictatorship.

To be continued . . .

Is Your Mind in Remarkable Shape? (#5)

According to Jordan Cooper: “If you’re over 65 and can still remember these 12 life events, your mind is in remarkable shape.” 

We have tackled the 4 life events in previous posts. We are now in #5: A DIFFICULT GOODBYE

“We don’t love these memories but we keep them. If you can recall the chair you sat in, who held your hand, what the doctor said, or the exact way the room smelled, it means your mind preserved the feelings and the facts. That’s emotional granularity—being able to name experiences precisely. It’s protective, not punishing. And yes, being able to talk about it without getting lost is a strong sign of cognitive resilience.”

 November 4, 2012 @ 9:00 AM: We were sitting at our bar stools when Tatay’s geriatrician calmly announced :“Be ready for the inevitable. Expect Tatay to be gone anytime today. Do your best to make his remaining hours comfortable and happy.” Nanay, Ate Ella and I held each other’s hands while trying to hold back our tears. My immediate reaction was:  “Nanay, please do not argue with Tatay anymore. For once, just agree with him OK?”

I hurriedly called Ate Mel (my ‘adopted’ sister) in Pampanga to go to Las Piñas right away. Then I called Tatay’s remaining sisters—Ate Deliang in Sta. Cecilia Village and Ate Bella in Naic, Cavite. Next, his cousins, nephews and nieces close to him living near and far. Then his friends within Philamlife Village and in other subdivisions.

From 10:00 AM until 7:00 PM Tatay was visited by his friends and relatives close to him. Luckily, they came in batches and not at the same time. For a while, I desperately hoped that Dra. Joy made the wrong prognosis. My father was welcoming his visitors with heightened vigor and enthusiasm. He was even telling anecdotes and laughing with them! When my cousin Dennis came and introduced his girlfriend who has a twin sister, Tatay jokingly said “it’s good you don’t make the mistake of choosing the wrong girlfriend.”

The last to arrive was the Special Minister of the Eucharist who gave my father Holy Communion. When he left, I fed Tatay his dinner. That’s when he told me that his only remaining wish was for me to be beside him when he finally breathe his last. I assured him that I would certainly make his dream come true. Then I asked him if we could still leave and attend the 8:30 PM Sunday Mass. He urged us to go so we could pray for him.

Thank God we returned home just in time to exchange our heartbreaking goodbyes.

To be continued . . .

Goodbye My Dearest Ultra

Given the sporadic nature of my present duties for Nanay, Gio, Eia and our household, my ultimate dream of running the 100k Ultramarathon has to be shelved for now. I just wish that when the right time comes, my aging body could still endure the demands of its gruelling training schedule. If by God’s grace I do make it, I will probably be the first Filipina to run 100k at 100 heheheh . . 

Running will still be the star of my weekly regimen but focus will be on speed rather than distance. This is in coherence with my current availability constraint. I no longer have the luxury of running for endless hours. Hence, my new training schedule would be:

Monday: YOGA with Gio and Eia

Tuesday:  Easy Run

Wednesday: Strength Training 

Thursday: Tempo Run/Speed Interval Workout

Friday: Strength Training (Groceries/Marketing)

Saturday: Zumba with Eia and our neighbor Annie

Sunday: Long Run with Hills

Goodbye my dearest Ultra. I will always keep you in my heart, now and forever. Hoping that someday, you and I will finally be together.

Is Your Mind in Remarkable Shape? (#4)

According to Jordan Cooper: “If you’re over 65 and can still remember these 12 life events, your mind is in remarkable shape.” 

We have tackled the 3 life events in previous posts. We are now in #4: YOUR WEDDING DAY OR A CELEBRATION THAT CHANGED YOUR CIRCLE

“Maybe it wasn’t a wedding. Maybe it was the day a new grandchild arrived, or a reunion where everyone finally came home. If you can recall the song, the toast, the way someone’s voice cracked at the end of a sentence, you’re showing off your brain’s ability to bind PEOPLE + EMOTION + PLACE into one durable file. Bonus points if you remember what went wrong (there’s always something) and how folks rallied.”

January 25, 1997: Friends and relatives came from near and far to witness the Once-In-A-Lifetime Event that nobody thought possible—my wedding! It was like a Grand Reunion like no other. Normally, the death of a dearly beloved brings members of the family and long-lost friends together in the wake. In this case however, I was still breathing and very much alive.

I will start with what went wrong. The invitation specified 3:30 PM. At 4 PM, my “Prince Charming” called me. He sounded very nervous. He asked me why I was still home. The church was already filled with guests he didn’t know. Quite understandable because out of the 250 guests, he only had 25.

A few days before the wedding, we had  a terrible fight. At the height of my rage and anger, I called the wedding off. After all the hullabalou, we reconciled but a reasonable doubt clouded my mind. So I instructed him to go the Parish Office as soon as he arrived at the church and call me. I wanted to be sure that he was already there when I show up in my eye-popping body-hugging wedding dress.

Apparently, he forgot about our deal. He thought I changed my mind of marrying him because I was never late of our scheduled appointments. When the official photographer knew that we were finally leaving, he summoned the parents of the bride. That’s when I realized that Tatay already left ahead of us. Nanay told me he was excited to entertain his own set of friends in the church. So Tatay was missing in the video and photoshoot of his only daughter’s pre-wedding documentation.

I requested our accompanist/vocalist to sing “Sa Iyo Lamang” as our Wedding Song. Back then, I didn’t know that it was actually a Funeral Song.

Both my husband’s father and mother cried a river during the wedding. I vividly remember his mother talking to Nanay in between sobs with her trembling voice “siya ang pinakamabait sa mga anak ko.”  (He is the nicest among my children)  His father was also talking to Tatay with the same exact words in his own cracked voice. Can somebody enlighten me why the parents of the groom were the ones weeping and not the parents of the bride? 

In the wedding reception, my godson Macky and I belted out Bon Jovi’s tear-jerking song “I’ll be there for you”. Thank God my son Gio was not yet alive during that tine.  Otherwise, he would have hidden himself under the table until everybody was gone. But of course, the guests didn’t mind. They saw how happy I was that a little damage to their eardrums won’t hurt that much.

To be continued . . .

Is Your Mind in Remarkable Shape? (#3)

According to Jordan Cooper: “If you’re over 65 and can still remember these 12 life events, your mind is in remarkable shape.” 

We have tackled #1 and #2 life events in previous posts. We are now in #3: A MAJOR MOVE

“Moves burn into memory because they force your brain to remap daily life. If you can remember the exact street, apartment number, first neighbor you met, and how the light fell in the kitchen at 5 p.m., your spatial and autobiographical systems are high-functioning teammates.”

I have moved countless times in my life. Some were major moves and a lot of minor ones in between. 

For once and for all, I want to seal the exact number of times I moved in the past. Bear with me as I run through Memory Lane to feed my burning curiosity. 

Here goes:

1. When I was 6, we transferred from Dizon Apartment to our very first home along Gen, Santos Drive, Marbel, South Cotabato. Bombit Gabaldon was the first neighbor I met—also my first Crush heheheh . . . Though we studied at different schools, we became close as playmates. Our house had lots of windows. At 5 PM, our kitchen was still well-lighted by the natural beams of sunlight.

2. During the summer of 1973, I transferred to Imang Bayang’s apartment at Leveriza St, Malate Manila. It was right in front of San Andres Market. Our neighbors there were members of the generational gang wars which were prevalent during those time. I thought Imang Bayang was joking when she warned me to watch out for stray arrows while walking along Leveriza St. for I could be in the middle of a messy gang war. When I saw the people around me suddenly got down to avoid being hit by stray arrows, I did realize gang wars were real so I hurriedly laid flat on the ground to protect myself!

3. When classes started, I resided in Holy Spirit Dorm at 790 San Sebastian St.with Neneng, Nimfa, Menchu, Leah, Haida and Ningning. It was just in front of University of the East where I studied 3rd yr and 4th yr High School.

4. After high school graduation, I brought my things back to Leveriza.

5. From Leveriza, I moved to UP Kalayaan Residence Hall in Diliman, Quezon City in 1975. We were the first residents of this Co-Ed Dorm for Freshmen. The first neighbor I met was Elsa. Though we were both from Marbel, our paths did not cross before because she studied in Notre Dame while I studied in public schools prior to UE HS. But we became so close that she is now my son’s godmother.

6. After my Freshman year, I brought my things back to Leveriza.

7. From Leveriza, I moved to 37-C Tomas Morato Avenue, Quezon City in 1976 with the de Jesus siblings. They were family friends from Marbel. Ate Baby and I shared the same room and the boys (Abet, Jojo and Peter) stayed in the other room. Sometimes, Kuya Ato visited when he had free time. Their other siblings Vic, Ondet and Detdet from UP LB usually spent  weekends with us.

8. In 1977, Tatay and Nanay finally left Marbel to join their only daughter. From Tomas Morato, I excitedly moved to our new home in Philamlife Village. The first neighbors I met were mother and son Vicky and Ariel. Vicky was a Voice Teacher so every morning, her playing scales on the piano and vocalization with her son prompted my day instead of the rooster’s cock-a-doodle-doo at dawn.

9. Before settling in our new home, Nanay and I returned to Marbel to tie loose ends. Philamlife bought our property there so we had to clear the whole house. We had a Garage Sale of the things we wanted to dispose. Some were just given away. Those furnitures and other items we loved so much travelled with us on the same ship that we rode from GenSan to Manila. From Manila, we hired a Lipat Bahay Truck to bring them to Philamlife Village.

10. I was away from my parents for 4 years so even though it was time consuming, I commuted from Las Piñas City to UP Diliman Quezon City and back to be with them. During my final year however, my undergraduate thesis needed undivided attention so I decided to stay in Molave Hall, a dormitory inside UP Campus.

11. From Molave Hall, I immediately went back to Philamlife Village after my gruelling Thesis Defense.

12. After graduation, I took a looong vacation then joined the Soft Drinks Division of SMC in 1980 where I initially clocked from 7 AM to 7 PM. It was exhausting to commute after working for 12 hours so I moved to a Room for Rent near my office in Makati.

13. From Makati, I moved back to Philamlife Village when my new charismatic Boss designated an official driver for me. He actually talked to my father and asked his permission if I could regularly work overtime. He assured Tatay that a driver will always bring me home every night. 

14. In 1983, I moved in with my 4 classmates in CRC (Center for Research and Communication) to an apartment in Bo.Kapitolyo, Pasig City. We were the first batch of female qualifiers for the Work and Study Scholarship Program in MS Industrial Economics.

15. When Vins, Tess and Grace returned to their homes, Gay and I rented a room near Pasig City Hall but only for a while. The owner’s ferocious dog bit me so we scouted around for a new place to stay.

16. After a few months, Gay and I transferred to a studio-type room in San Antonio Subd, very near CRC. Then she got married and left for the States so I was left alone. 

17. In 1986, some friends and I put up a corporation and opened a restaurant in Ermita, Manila. That’s when I moved to an apartment at Vito Cruz St.

18. I moved back to Philamlife Village when we closed the restaurant. My childhood dream was to make clothes so I went to a Fashion School and started a garments shop in our garage.

19. From our garage in Philamlife Village, I transferred my sewing equipments to a commercial space fronting PLDT in Talon. That was 1989.

20.  In 1990, we moved to a place with 2 bedrooms to house the stay-in sewers and staff. It was in front of Southland Homes.

21. In 1991, we moved to a house inside BF Resort Village.

22. In 1992, we moved to a house near Christ the King Church.

23. In 1993, we moved to San Isidro Subd. where I rented 2 apartments. One was for the Shop and the other one for the living quarters of sewers and staff.

24. When I got married in January 1997, my then husband took over the management of my garments business in August and we moved to a 3-storey building near CAA shortly after I gave birth to Gio.

25. In 1998, we transferred to a big residential house in Airmen’s Village and converted it into a factory with housing of stay-in sewers and staff.

26. In 1999, while pregnant with Eia, we transferred to an even bigger building along CAA Road. Back then, we had 45 workers.

27. Gio was in Nursery when we transferred residence to an apartment in Sta. Cecilia Village.

28. From Sta. Cecilia Village, we moved back to Philamlife Village but we transferred our things from the apartment to the Auto Repair Shop that we recently opened. Being a mechanic, it was my Ex-husband’s dream and my mother was generous enough to support him financially.

When my EX and I parted ways in 2002, I did not bring anything with me from the Garments Factory and neither from the Auto Repair shop.. I left everything behind without looking back. I regarded the material things I lost as the price I had to pay to regain my freedom.

So all in all, I moved 28 times since I was 6 years old. My parents told me that we changed residence twice before settling in Dizon Apartment. That means I moved 30 times from the time I was born to the time my heart died for my husband.

Thanks to Jordan Cooper’s article, my curiosity was ignited and my memory stretched. I now know the exact number of times I moved.

Do you?

To be continued . . .

Postscript to #2: The Day I Learned to Drive

In my previous post, you learned that I was only 10 when I received my first driving lesson from my dear father in my hometown Marbel, South Cotabato. Through the succeeding years, Tatay would bring me to vast vacant lots where I could hone my driving skills.

Fast forward when it was crucial for me to use a delivery van in Metro Manila for my garments subcontracting business. Nanay would only allow me to drive if I formally enrolled in a Driving School. For her, Tatay was a reckless driver. She did not trust him to have taught me the right way to drive. She believed that the only way to learn proper driving was from a reputable Driving School. To further convince me, she hinted that she would shoulder the Tuition Fee if I did enroll.

Just to ease my mother’s mind (plus the fact that she was the one paying heheheh…), I enrolled in a 5-day Driving Course complete with 5 weekend classroom teaching of Trouble Shooting. 

Before we started our first lesson, my arrogant instructor warned me that every time the engine accidentally stops due to my negligence, I would pay him a bottle of Coke. I asked him if there was ever a student who escaped this punishment and he boastfully replied none so far.

And so it began. With Angela Bofill’s song “Break it to me gently” vibrating in the air, I maneuvered the Driving School’s car with the glaring caption “STUDENT DRIVER” plastered on its front, sides and back. I followed my teacher’s instruction to signal right or left whenever we turned. On our first day, we just circled around the block of Manuela Commercial Complex, the mall right outside our Village. We reached 1 hour without any mishap. Hence, no Coke for him.

On our second day, we explored the very narrow street of CAA. The road was slippery, muddy and filled with humongous potholes. There we encountered all possible forms of transportation you can only find in the Philippines. Pedestrian lanes were non-existent. People crossed the street from anywhere to everywhere anytime without any qualms whatsoever. I bet he was waiting for me to break down but I maintained my composure. Again, no Coke for him.

On our third day, we drove to Alabang. There, we practiced ascending/descending hills and entering/exiting different parking space locations. He intentionally asked me to stop while backing up a slope, expecting that it would rattle me but I did not flinch. For 3 consecutive days, I did not owe him any Coke.

On our fourth day, we entered the EXPRESSWAY. That was the time to drive really fast or the other motorists would throw matchsticks at you if you were moving like a turtle. I remember catching a glimpse of him gripping tightly on the upper bar as if his life depended on it. He probably thought it would be the end of him. He must be totally relieved when we finally returned to the Driving School in 1 piece. That’s when he announced that I no longer need to report the next day. He rationalized that I already finished the 5-day Course in 4 days. He also commented that he couldn’t fathom why I bothered to enroll in the first place.

My, my, my. And I was even planning to treat him for lunch with Coke on our fifth day! Oh well, some things were just not meant to be.

Is Your Mind in Remarkable Shape? (#2)

According to Jordan Cooper: “If you’re over 65 and can still  remember these 12 life events, your mind is in remarkable shape.” 

We tackled #1 in previous post. We are now in #2: THE DAY YOU LEARNED TO DRIVE

“Parallel parking on a hill. White knuckles. The instructor with the peppermint breath. Vivid recall here blends motor memory with context: the route you took, the song on the radio, the one instruction you still hear when you back up (“turn the wheel toward the curb”). If those details snap into place when asked, it’s a quiet sign your brain tags emotional learning and keeps it accessible.”

I will never forget my first driving lesson.  I was only 10 then.

Tatay and I were waiting for Nanay in the car for our Sunday Mass. Out of the blue, Tatay instructed me to sit in front and watch him turn on the ignition. Then we switched places. When I successfully turned on the ignition, he showed me how to  manually back up. Our house was located at the farthest end of a 750-sq m. lot so our perimeter gate was about 400 m from our garage. While some people are finding it hard to back up, it became my forte for obvious reason.

The radio was not on because Tatay was giving me a lecture on basic driving course. Besides, even if the radio was on, it would be inaudible because of Tatay’s loud voice which became even louder when I almost hit our still closed gate and he shouted “BRAKE!”.  Thank God I did not panic and hit the brake in the nick of time.

I survived my first driving lesson. 57 years ago!

To be continued . . .