Flashbacks of forgotten memories flooded my mind as if everything only happened yesterday. I tried to hit PAUSE but I couldn’t stop my brain from REWINDing.
We were in his office when he gave me a shocking Directive which totally wrecked me. He instructed me never to visit him nor call him unless I was on the verge of dying. I could have stabbed him thrice and pleaded in court that my action was a Crime of Passion but I didn’t. I did not demand anything from him. I also did not accuse him of anything. I just walked out of his office. And out of his life.
It only took me a few months to recover from a previous romantic relationship but this time, it took me more than a year to gather the broken pieces of my disheveled life. Losing a best friend was a thousand times more devastating than losing a boyfriend.
As Barbra’s song goes . . . I thought we were lovers . . . I thought we were friends. I guess when reality steps in the dreaming ends.
Unrequited love is undeniably the most painful of all human experiences (next to death of a parent). I had to revamp my whole life to start anew without him by my side. It was a desolate journey.
I thought the crying would never stop. I thought I could never forgive him.
But miracles do happen. Through time the deepest of wounds healed and unconditional love prevailed.
We are back being friends and catch up whenever our schedules permit!
Letting go is an agonizing process but completely necessary to find yourself again and live your life with confidence, honour and dignity.
