What Time Is It?

A former Elementary admirer recently asked me why I was still working when I should be relaxing already.

I am almost 63 but working still.  Not because I want to but because I need to.  When laziness creeps in, I turn to this reminder I made during one of those days when I just wanted to surrender and give up (and wished that God bless me with a darling hubby who would provide for our family hahahah  .  .  .  ).

My reminder says:

HEY YOU:

There will come a time when you will no longer need to actively work inorder to earn money.  You may still work but not because you need to, but because you want to. That day will come when you can just relax the whole day watching Kissasian.sh (Netfix to some) and passive income will still come pouring in.  There will ccme a time when you will no longer need to be stringent with your household budget because your earnings will outlive even your children’s or dependents’  life spans.

But that time is NOT now.

Today you work hard.  

Serve your clients’ needs with passion, love and diligence.

Expand your comfort zone.

Broaden your territory.

Maximize your side hustle.

Constantly search for investment opportunities.

Find more ways to grow your finances.

Now is NOT the time to relax.

Now is the time to work really hard.

PRIORITIZE.

How about you?  If you re-examine your life now, is it time to pause or time to pivot?  Is it time to relax or time to work hard?  Do you recklessly spend in your spare time instead of finding ways to earn more?

(Thanks for dropping by my blog.  Feel free to send your comments or reactions via Messenger or to ndelr62@gmail.com.  Stay safe everyone!)

The Pain of Losing Tatay and the Joy of Running 50k at 55

Ran my first 5k Race when I turned 50.  

5 years later, I dared to attempt my first 50k.

For someone who vowed never to run beyond 5k, it took a tragic incident to trigger the passion and the purpose to run an ultramarathon.

My father and mother never agreed on anything but strangely enough, they were both against my running and joining races.  They had a litany of reasons why I should stop “acting like a child”.  I argued with them that running was therapeutic for me—much cheaper than engaging with a psychotherapist.  They would uselessly worry everytime I join a race but couldn’t do anything to prevent me (their precious unica hija) from leaving the comfort of our home.

Then sometime before Nov. 4, 2012, the unexpected happened.  Without any lingering medical illness, Tatay announced out of the blue:  “Pagod na ako.  Gusto ko ng magpahinga.”  (I am tired. I want to rest.) And by that he meant to Rest In Peace, not just to take a break. I suggested that we bring him to the hospital but he refused warning us “Kung gusto nyo na akong mamatay, dalhin nyo ako sa ospital.” (If you want me to die, bring me to the hospital). Instead, he specifically asked for my friend Mimi who is now a renowned gastroenterologist.  Mimi rushed to Las Piñas City from Batasan Hills, Quezon City together with Elsa and Malou, all friends from my dearest hometown Marbel, South Cotabato. Thanks to them, I saw Tatay very happy!

When Mimi examined Tatay, she was honest enough to warn me that Tatay would be most likely to leave very soon.  She said we should be ready for the worst.  But how can one be ready to let go of a father or a mother?  The following day, Nov. 4, 2012, her geriatrician Dra. Joy came. She confirmed what Mimi told us but only this time, she was direct that Tatay won’t be around the next day.

Fearing for the unknown, I frantically informed his remaining siblings, friends, and relatives to visit him that very day so they could still talk to him while he was still with us. People close to my father came from near and far to see him. He still cracked jokes and laughed with them until evening. Seeing how delighted he was with the people he loved, we thought Tatay would still be with us for many years.

Inspite of Dra. Joy’s advice, we did not anticipate that after we arrived from the 8:30 PM Sunday Mass, Tatay would breathe his last.

I used to believe that unrequited love was the most painful of all human experiences.

I was wrong.

The passing away of someone you deeply love digs a hole in your heart that you cannot seem to endure.  You would have just wanted to disappear from the face of the earth but choose to hang on because your family needs you to care for them.

Everyday since my father’s untimely demise up to his 1st Death Anniversary, I wore black. Everything from undies, running gear, tennis outfit, house garments, outside clothes, business attire, cocktail dress, long gown, to my sleepwear were dominantly black.  For me, black complemented my sorrow and pain.

I worked harder and ran longer but shunned away from any organized race from November 2012 until November 2013.  It was my deliberate form of sacrifice to pay respect to my dear Tatay, to send a message that my heart was profusely grieving.

Working harder kept me occupied and running longer kept me sane.  I thought of doing something spectacular and significant that would commemorate the end of my whole-year hiatus from foot races. That’s when the crazy idea of joining a 50k Ultramarathon toyed my mind.

 I have raised funds for DSAPI (Down Syndrome Assn. of the Phils. Inc.) when I ran my first 5k Race and first marathon (42.195km).  It would logically be appropriate that I level up to 50k Ultra if I were to raise funds for DSAPI again.  I have already been logging more miles into my personal Training Journal.  I have run distances I never thought I could run before.  As the saying goes—YOU CAN’T RUN AWAY FROM YOUR PROBLEMS, BUT YOU CAN RUN YOUR PROBLEMS AWAY!

Besides, Tatay won’t needlessly worry about me running 50k anymore because he was no longer living with us.  This time around, he could be looking down from heaven joyfully clapping his hands cheering for me!

Can’t We Start Over Again?

Yes, you’re right.  It is one of Jose Mari Chan’s hits.  My “Puppy Love” said this to me last night.  I truly admire this person’s bravery and honesty.  But some things are just not meant to be.  Almost always, “starting over again” is beyond reach.

But writing again in this blog is definitely possible!  Yes, after almost 8 years of self-imposed hiatus, I will try my very best to “start over again”.  It won’t be easy but hey, life itself is not easy.

I dropped my pen when I started training for my first Ultramarathon.  Much has happened since then.  So many stories to tell.  Don’t know where and how to begin.  But for now, I am simply signifying my desire to start over again!  So help me God.

Rene, the JazzRunner's Tips on How to Train for your First ULTRAMARATHON

Thank you so much Rene for the following tips you gave me.

According to Rene in his own words:

Wala namang pinagkaiba ang training sa 50k Ultra at 42k Marathon.  Halos pareho lang. (There’s no big difference in training for a 42k and 50k)

1.  Habaan mo lang mga week-end long runs mo (make your weekend runs longer) and do a couple of back-to-back long runs.  Ex:  25k Saturday then 30k Sunday (kung kaya) or else one long run lang.

2.  Dito papasok si Galloway training which I'm sure you are familiar (TBRDM).  Sa actual race, ALWAYS walk the uphills then Galloway the flat and downhills.

3.  Do some cross training once a week (lunges/squats/sit-ups/push ups/weights/core,etc.) which will tremendously fight the fatigue and strengthen the muscles in your legs!  Kailangan ito sa Ultramarathons!(these are needed for Ultras)

4.  Minimum of 4-5 days a week ang training, including your long runs.  Make 10k minimum during week-day. 

5.  Organize your support team now.  Vehicle, personnel, at least 3 people including driver, preferably RUNNERS!   Don't worry, support vehicles tend to support other runners during the race. This is another topic kasi very crucial ang gagawin nila.  They are there to support you not only physically but mentally and emotionally also.  Anna or other ultra runners can help you with the mechanics of a support team.

6.  Don't forget to EAT during the 50k race (bread, bananas, biscuits, gatorade, etc.).  Anything that your support team will offer you, take it!

I will add more to this during the course of your training.  You have 18 weeks to train so start na TOMORROW!

I might join this run. If not, might help support runners including you!

Good luck on your training.


 

Life Begins at 55!

5 years ago, I dreamed of running 5k and after I did it, I thought that was IT.

Runner bloggers urged me to try 10K but I just shrugged my shoulders and in my mind, told myself "I will never run beyond 5k!"

Then it happened.  What I thought impossible before became possible!

I ran my first 10k at a very comfortable pace (during that time when my waist was still 27 inches hah hah . . .) and finished at 1 hour 10 minutes.

10k was the perfect distance for me then.  No pain, no sweat (well, a little).

After 1 year, 10k became a "walk in the park" (naks yabang!)

Time to level up.

When I crossed the Finish Line at the Condura Skyway Half-Marathon last February 2010, I surprised myself when I strongly felt that I could still run another 21k!  I excitedly told Ate Ella -- "Yon lang ang 21k?  Pwede pa akong bumalik at ulitin ang tinakbo ko!  I am ready to run the MARATHON!"

I was among the first batch of TBRDM (The Bull Runner Dream Marathon) held last May 22, 2010.  But before this, I managed to run 2 more Half-Marathons  -- 1 in March and 1 in April in preparation for my first 42.195k.

Fast forward to the present:

I turned 55 last June 6 and my birthday wish is to run (drum rolls please!) . . . 50 km!!!

As of this writing, my eyes are set on Rizal to Laguna Ultramarathon which will be on Nov. 3, 2013 (exactly the last day of mourning for my father who passed away last Nov. 4, 2012)

I ran my first 5k at 50 (5 km at 50 years of age)

This year, it will be 50k at 5 (50 km after 5 years of running)

That's my first birthday wish.

My second birthday wish is to encourage YOU to join me.

Please say Y-E-S!

55 Years and Still Counting (HOW TO SURVIVE 55 YEARS OF MARRIAGE)

55 years ago today, a handsome bachelor from Cavite and a young midwife from Pampanga pledged their love and fidelity for each other with the Sacrament of Matrimony in the progressive town of Marbel, South Cotabato (now Koronadal City).

The man was the eldest of 5 while the woman was the eldest of 10.

How the two of them managed to be alive and sane after 55 years of fighting is something that the human mind cannot comprehend.

My parents are not the typical couple that you encounter everyday.  In fact, my family is not the typical family that you encounter everyday.  But then again, who can say what is typical and what's not?  What could be normal to some might not be normal to the rest of the human race.

As Jackie of 97.9 FM radio aptly put it:  "Lady, you've got 2 choices:  Remain single and regret it for the rest of your life or get married and wished you were dead."

I was driving when I heard this and I almost hit the car in front of me because I was laughing uncontrollably.

Until now, I still grin from ear to ear whenever I think of Jackie’s dilemma.

Back to my parents.  Below are weird tips on how to survive 55 years of marriage, based on what I learned from my authoritative father and vivacious mother.

1. According to my dear Tatay, he chose Nanay because he's the silent type and nanay's the type who loves talking and entertaining other people.  So if you're still single, choose someone with your opposite qualities.

2.  My parents are exact opposites of each other.  Given a positive situation, my father will still find something negative about that situation.  Given a negative situation, my mother will surely find something positive about that situation.   I guess the cliche "love doesn't consist in looking at each other but in looking together in the same direction" didn't work for them.  They always look in opposite direction!

3.  Tatay turned 87 last Nov. and nanay will be 78 this May.  It's an advantage on my father's part because his wife is much younger than he is.  While he's already weak, his wife is still strong to take care of him.  So if you can find a partner at least 10 years younger than you, you're lucky!

The problem with them now is this:  At night tatay cannot stand the cold in their bedroom so he goes out to the living room to sleep.  That's the disadvantage of the big difference in age.  You won't grow old at the same time.  Hence, your adaptation to changes in temperature will also vary.  Funny how my father behaves now.  At night he goes out to the living room to sleep on the rocking chair but during the day, he stays inside the bedroom to eat his merienda because according to him, it is colder in the bedroom.

4.  My parents don't agree on anything (well, almost!)  When he says its cold, she'll say its hot.  When he says its short, she'll say its long.  But when he says let's pray, she'll say yes, let's pray.

My advice is:  Agree to disagree.  Don't even dream of convincing your partner.  If you want something, ask for the opposite of what you want so in the end, you'll get what you want.

5.  Both of them are happily married.  Simply because they are happy with their own sets of friends.  Tatay used to have walking buddies, tennis mates, Charismatic brothers and sisters, and co-servers in the Special Ministry of the Eucharist.  Nanay on the other hand, enjoys the company of her staff and agents and fellow managers.

6.  In relation to no. 5, Tatay is now going through depression because some of his friends are no longer alive and he has been retired from his beloved Ministry while my mother is now adjusting from being a career woman to a simple housewife.  Life in our household has been crazy lately because of these kinks and transitions but as the saying goes . . . all these will pass.

While it's healthy to have friends who will support you through and through, your happiness should not solely depend on them.  Remember that your family will always be there to stick with you no matter what.

7.  My parents survived 55 years of marriage because they lived apart from each other.  No, they were not separated by choice.  Nanay was assigned in Pampanga and had to work there from Monday to Friday and stayed with us only during Saturdays and Sundays.  I used to believe that my mother will never retire from Management but by God's grace, she is technically retired—officially!  Now that they are finally together in one roof, I will do everything in my power to prevent a civil war. (I badly need your prayers too!).  I don't know how to pull this off but I will.  I must.

8.  I don't know who said this but should be the guiding principle of every husband:  "the greatest gift a father could give his children is to be faithful to their mother."  For the past 55 years, my father never cheated on my mother.  How do I know?  Because my mother vowed that one wrong turn is enough for her to leave my father.  And they are still together now.

9.  My parents are like cats and dogs when they talk to each other.  A simple conversation always ends up in an argument.  But what I admire with them is this:  They forgive and forget.  The offender forgets the harsh words said, and the offended forgives naturally.

10.  If there's only one rule that could describe how a marriage survives 55 years, it is ACCEPTANCE.  Never try to change a person according to what you perceive him/her to be.  As my mother always say, you can no longer erase the black and white stripes of a zebra.

In closing, allow me to share with you these 3 guidelines (ABF) given to us by our new company president, the formidable Rex Mendoza:

1.  Accept the Brutal Fact.
2.  Aspire for a Better Future.
3.  Act with Bold Faith.

PAIN IS TEMPORARY (How I Survived The Bull Runner Dream Marathon In 1 Piece)

Running a marathon was NEVER in my bucket list.

My only dream was to run 5km on my 50th birthday and that's it.  No more. No less.

And so after training for 1 whole year (that's how unfit I was back then), I fulfilled my dream.  End of story.

But as my mentor and inspiration Jaymie Pizarro transformed herself from a newbie runner to what she is today (fulfilling her ultimate dream of running the New York Marathon twice and soon-to-be finisher in the much-acclaimed Ironman 70.3 in Cebu), I also found myself being mesmerized and hooked to bigger goals and aspirations.

Knowing Jaymie, I didn't think twice to sign up for the very first TBRDM which transpired last May 22, 2010.

5 days before the Big Day, I met a freak accident and injured my ankle.

The thought of quitting crossed my mind but I couldn't disappoint the people who generously donated for every kilometer that I run for the Down Syndrome Association of the Phils. (DSAPI), the beneficiary of my first marathon.

Thanks to my dream chaser Carlo Dacanay who ran with me all the way from the 11th km to the very end, I was able to finish at 7 hours 38 minutes.

For more than a year, the question "what could be my real time if I ran the marathon without any  injury?" kept nagging me.

In order to satisfy my curiosity, I decided to join TBRDM again (I'm still qualified because this would only be my second).

This time around, I vowed to get my revenge.

Or so I thought.

I did not over train nor under train.  I could feel in my bones that I could finish in 6 hours or sub 6:30 the very least.

I only had 3 half-marathons before my first marathon.  Much have changed since then.

This time, I already conquered 10 half-marathons and two 32km races and of course, 1 marathon.

With my dear friend Anna (the Meek Runner) as pacer, what could possibly go wrong?

Anna and I lodged at El Cielito Inn @3PM last Saturday, March 17,2012.

I drank 1 bottle of beer @6PM to make sure I'll get a good night sleep before the race.

We greeted each other Good Morning before 12AM and @1AM, we were already on our way to Nuvali.

The festive atmosphere greeted us when we arrived at the Dream Village.  We just made a quick stop at the ladies room, deposited our bags and headed to the registration station.

The queue was quite long and I had the chance to meet Malou Felix who flew all the way from Naga to join TBRDM.  I really admired her determination and spirit!

But what she said to me really warmed my heart and ignited my soul:  "Ma'am Nora, you're running again pala!"
I was surprised that she recognized me so she continued: "Nabasa ko po kayo sa TBR so I read your blog.  Kayo po ang nag-inspire sa akin to run the marathon."

Thank you, Malou, for those very nice words.  You just don't know how elated I was hearing those words from you.

After we got our timing chip and one-of-a-kind wrist band,  the usual pre-race program began.  We were inspired by Coach Jim, Neville, and of course Jaymie -- the remarkable woman who once dreamed to run a marathon and after doing one, dreamed of helping first-time marathoners attain their dreams.

With me are Malou (the runner from Naga), Jaymie, my lovely pacer Anna, and dear friend Carrie.

After a short prayer led by Craig Logan, we were off at exactly 2AM.

Everything was running smoothly as planned.  We started slow, maintaining a 2:1 interval. At 12km, Anna informed me our estimated time is 6 hrs 20 mins.  I told her we will be stronger in the second half.

But @km 13, I had to leave Anna because of an unavoidable circumstance.  She had to do something that only women do (oh, but I'm already exempted to do it because I'm  through with it when I turned 50).

And so I continued without my pacer (who's a 6-time marathoner if I may add).  I religiously followed the 2:1 interval but this time, I had to look at my watch every now and then to check if it's time for me to run or to walk.

So far so good.  On the way back, at @km 22, I heard "Dancing Queen" being played and couldn't control myself.  I recklessly danced to the beat, entertaining the dream chasers and runners alike.

I was in high spirits, only to discover later on that I may have done something terribly wrong.

At km 25, I felt a tremendous pain on my left knee that I just had to stop.  I could barely walk and hence, could no longer follow the 2:1 interval because of excruciating pain.

Yes, I have been injured before my first marathon but I have never been injured during any race.

This kind of experience is very new to me.  I didn't know what to do.  The pain was simply unbearable.

Then I saw Anna from afar, holding 2 cups of Gatorade.

Tears suddenly rolled down my cheeks.  I got my towelette and pretended that I was wiping my sweat.

I wanted to give up but how could I tell Anna?

It was a long stretch uphill and when I couldn't take it anymore, I just screamed.  Faster than a speeding bullet, Anna asked some ice in a plastic bag and placed it on my knee.  I had to sit down and after a while, we continued the painful journey, bringing with me the plastic bag of ice.

Later on the 2:1 interval became 1:1.
But not 1 minute run, 1 minute walk.
1:1 now became 1 minute run, 1 minute stop. We stopped  either for ice compress or liniment or spray whichever is available.

Anna asked me to do small steps and we did just that.  She gave me chocolates, banana, candy, and along the way there were lots of goodies available.

By God's grace, Din and Carrie passed by us and immediately offered help by lending me a band that Anna secured under my knee.  Thank you Din and Carrie!  With so many angels supporting me, there's no way I won't make it to the finish line.

Then at km 39 I couldn't believe my eyes when we passed by Jay sitting on his bike. 

I haven't seen Jay for ages that's why I was sooooh happy to see him last Sunday.

Only 3kms to go but it felt like 10 more kms at the rate that we're going.

With only 1 more km left, Gio called to ask how I was doing.  He told me they are already waiting for me before the finish line.

Then finally, the 42km mark was vividly in front of me.  This is the most dramatic part of TBRDM.

The 42km mark is already in front of us but it's not yet the end.  We had to pass the 42km mark, then turn right to run the remaining .195 km!  While walking to the final right turn point, I was blaming the Queen of England for this additional distance that runners had to endure.

Seeing the Finish line put a smile on my weary face.  More so when I heard my children calling me and urging me to go on.

Anna and I could now see my support team so even though my left knee was still tormenting me, I tried my best to smile.  The truth is, at this point I just wanted to scream and cry because of the agonizing pain.

Then just before the finish line, Ate Ella rushed to give us flower bouquets together with Gio, Eia and Sis Mila carrying cheer posters.

                                                                          Almost there!  

Thank you Lord!  The sweet proof of all the struggles we went through.

Thank you Gio and Eia for the poster.  How sweet!

Thank you, my dear dear Anna who, in spite of her very uncooperative condition, patiently and faithfully pushed me to reach my destination.  Without her, I wouldn't be holding these beautiful medal and flowers.

Thank you Ate Ella, Gio, Eia, Anna and Sis Mila.  Hope someday we could all run the marathon together!

Thank you Jaymie and the whole TBRDM support team.  The Bull Runner Dream Marathon is everything that a newbie marathoner can hope for.  I have seen other runners limping their way to reach the finish line but the warm atmosphere of genuine love and support from all the people involved strengthen the runner's desire to reach his goal.

It is Jaymie's dream that every runner who crosses the finish line changes his life forever.

After finishing 2 TBRDMs, I can honestly affirm that Jaymie achieved more than this.

Because running a marathon is not only life-changing.

It changes a person for the better.

Knowing your limits and pushing yourself to exceed them is a painful journey but in the end, the joy of overcoming all obstacles that come your way is beyond compare.

After reaching your 42.195 goal, you forget all the aches and sufferings you went through.

You feel you are ready and ripe to take on anything in life.

So who's gonna join me run 55km next year, when I turn 55?