A Whole New World with Nanay’s Alzheimer’s (Part 3)

 For the past 2 days, Nanay talked almost non-stop. The other day, she thought we were still living in Marbel. Yesterday, she thought we were in Pampanga. She was bubbling about her agents and secretaries, meetings in her office, sales strategies, business opportunities, real properties. She couldn’t believe she already retired in 2012. She even thought Tatay was still alive! And she thought Gio and Eia were still going to school. She was planning to bring them to their respective schools. Then out of the blue she asked me if I was still looking for a husband. I told her I am not. Of course I lied heheheh . . .

She barely slept for the past 2 days. She was busy talking to people she thought were in her room. She was even laughing with them. I heard her mention their names and they were all friends and relatives who have gone ahead of us. She was conversing with them in her native tongue, Kapampangan. She kept telling me to prepare food for them.

At 5 AM this morning, she finally fell deeply asleep. I did not wake her up until 12 noon but she did not budge until 1:00 PM. She told me she didn’t want to eat anymore and when I cajoled her, she gestured to throw punches at me. I held her tight and after a few minutes, I managed to lift her up from the bed and we proceeded to the dining room.

She ate everything I prepared for her but only after a lot of convincing. She immediately went back to sleep after eating then drank her Ensure Gold @ 5 PM. After that, she dosed off until 7 PM to eat dinner. Again, it was a struggle to ask her to eat. She only took 5 spoons of rice with fish. Did not touch the grapes which used to be her favorite. 

After brushing her teeth and personal hygiene, we started with our evening ritual. I asked her to change her clothes herself so she could at least have some form of stretching, bending and pulling. After that, breathing exercises: inhale deeply through the nose then exhale slowly in a whistling manner. 5-10 reps. Then eye drops for her glaucoma. Moisturizing the face came next, followed by massaging her body with lotion from arms to toes. She was already in dreamland before I kissed her good night and sweet dreams.

I wonder what awaits tommorow . . .

A Whole New World with Nanay’s Alzheimer’s (Part 2)

 We were briefed by Nanay’s Neurologists and they pointed out the following:

1. There are two types of patients’s reactions to Alzheimer’s Disease: Aggresive or Passive. Aggresive behavior includes overtalkativeness, defiance and violent reactions while Passive is the exact opposite. Unlike his father, Nanay is passive.

2. There will be an evolution of Nanay’s facial recognition and memory. She will still recognize and remember the people who lives with her inside the household but eventually, we should expect the worst. Time will come when she will also forget us.

3. There will be changes in her daily habits. They will disappear one by one.

4. Her food intake will be lessened day by day until such time when she refuses to eat anymore that we will have no choice but to bring her to the hospital.

5. Her memories of people and places will slowly fade and might be completely erased someday.

6. Her preferences might change. Treat them with respect.

7. Do not force her to go out with you when she declines.

8. Encourage her to do some form of exercise everyday. Her body will deteriorate rapidly when she doesn’t move.

9. Avoid asking her the name of the person in front of her. Better to introduce the person right away.

10. Do not expect the medication to reverse Nanay’s condition. There is still no cure for Alzheimer’s Disease but the meds will hopefully slow down the process.

To be continued . . .

A Whole New World with Nanay’s Alzheimer’s (Part 1)

My mother was the first female provincial District Manager for sales of then Philamlife, now AIA Phils. Her area was South Cotabato. The Main Office was in Marbel (now Koronadal City) where we used to reside and a Branch Office in Dadiangas (now GenSan, the hometown of Manny Pacquaio) which we visited once a week.

Nanay’s family was originally from Pampanga but her parents settled in South Cotabato during the Magsaysay administration. In 1977, she was promoted as Agency Sales Manager for Pampanga and later on, Olongapo was included in her area of responsibility as well.

From an ordinary underwriter specializing in Salary Deduction, she rose to fame leading a Powerhouse Sales Agency in Pampanga/Olongapo. She served her beloved company for 50 solid years.

Nanay focused on her career and loved playing tennis, golf and bowling. Our house is practically a museum of her certificates, plaques, trophies, prizes and magazine write-ups.

She practiced a very healthy lifestyle. Even at a ripe age, she has no maintenance meds. According to her “I am not a car. I don’t need maintenance.”

My mother lived her life to the fullest. She earned the namesake “Mother of Perpetual Help” because of her kindness, gentleness and generosity.

When she retired at 78 (there’s no retirement in Sales so she actually resigned), she still dressed up and wore make-up everyday as if she’s going somewhere, Then after a few years she stopped doing this ritual but still meticulously groomed herself whenever she goes out of the house. Then one day she declared that if we want her to live longer, we just let her stay in the house and not force her to go out with us. Of course we still tried to convince her to join us during special occasions. Then came the pandemic. We were 8 in our household but I was the only one in and out of the house. After the pandemic she would only go out for Sunday mass but she still managed to walk a few blocks around our house every morning.

During meals she would tell the same stories all over again. We didn’t mind, as we knew oldies tend to repeat themselves. Then the story telling stopped. We told ourselves she probably got tired of talking already. We noticed changes in her behavior like telling me to stop giving her books for she no longer wanted to read. She used to love watching tennis and golf matches but that also stopped. There were memory lapses here and there but we thought they were simply part of the normal aging process. A Seminar on Dementia was held in our Parish and we attended. After that eye-opener, Nanay agreed to undergo the necessary series of tests and exams. It was then confirmed what we dreaded most: She has Alzheimer’s. 

To be continued . . .

Tribute to Ss Lou, Our Beloved Cluster Head

There are people who make a difference in other people’s lives. Ss Lou did beyond that. She made other people’s lives better. I, for one, became a better person because of her, so is every person who was fortunate enough to encounter her in this lifetime.

Ss is not a typographical error. She calls me Ss Nora so I call her Ss Lou. According to her, Ss stands for Soulsister. (God apparently couldn’t find a suitable Soulmate for me so He sent a Soulsister instead heheheh . . .)

I rejoined Handmaids Of The Lord in 2003 but it was only during the pandemic that Ss Lou and I became close. Call me snob, introvert, or whatever but I deliberately stayed in the shadows to hide my true identity. I was afraid to be known or recognized, fearing to be given responsiblities that would sacrifice my crucial obligations as father, mother, daughter, and homemaker to my family.

Very few people exhibit the same generous disposition as Ss Lou’s. Even those days when I strictly maintained significant distance between us, she was always showering me with kind words and gestures. It was her unrelenting spirit that finally broke down my wall and welcome her into my chaotic world. 

Ss Lou was the kind of person who will move heaven and earth to help anybody in need. She would pray unceasingly to lift up our individual concerns. She would go out of her comfort zone to lighten the burden of the oppressed. She would spend extra hours to think of ways and means to improve something that needed to be mended. She would love unconditionally and give readily without expecting anything in return. She was always beaming with joy, happiness and enthusiasm that would melt even the hardest of hearts. She would inspire you to believe in yourself, do your best and serve with grace, humility and gratitude to the Almighty.

Thank you Ss Lou, for letting us experience God’s redeeming love through your unparalled faith and devotion. Though I still cannot accept the harsh reality that you will be gone forever, thank you for making my 67th birthday uniquely memorable by allowing me and the countless people who adore you bring you to your final resting place. Hard as it is, I bid you farewell. You will be greatly missed, never to be forgotten. We love you, Ss Lou, now and forever!

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What is The Perfect Day For You?

 It was raining cats and dogs this morning, courtesy of Typhoon Crising but still went out to replenish our zero stock of fruits. Dropped by the water refilling station before going home. While trying to keep myself dry under the makeshift tent, a man was venting out his frustrations over a reckless driver to the water station staff. He had a distinct piercing voice that I would rather not listen to but I couldn’t run out of the tent because of the pouring rain. I tried to think of happy thoughts to distract myself of hearing his lamentations and I thought of this: “What could be the perfect day?”

Picture this: The perfect day must have the perfect weather—sunny but not too hot. I am joining the 100km Ultramarathon with a group of running friends who are highly motivated, properly trained and strongly determined to finish the race. We lift each other up through the 100km race route with our inspirational quotes, funny anecdotes and tear-jerker stories. When we hit the unavoidable wall, we cling to each other for support and encouragement. As we slowly approach the FinishLine, I see my family cheering for me with a bouquet of red roses and ice-cold beer. All the pains and aches in my body disappear and I fly like the wind! I receive my trophy, finishers shirt and medal but the flowers, hugs and kisses and beer from my family are the ones that would make the day perfect!

How about you? What do you picture as the perfect day?

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What is Your Diet? (Part 1)

 This was the question randomly thrown at me this morning before we practiced YOGA.

Almost instantaneously, I answered: “Diet does not exist in my dictionary. I don’t patronize any. I eat anything and everything, anytime I want.”

We proceeded with YOGA so I did not have time to explain what I really meant.

Let me qualify what I said.

Yes, I do eat anything and everything, anytime I want BUT I practice portion control—except when I am celebrating someone’s birthday in an Eat-All-You-Can Buffet. Unlimited Lunches or Dinners are usually scheduled in advance so I purposely fast the day BEFORE and the day AFTER I binge on my favorite food/desserts.

My typical day looks like this:

I take Herbalife 24 with oats and banana after my morning run. On days that I don’t run because of the rain, I only eat when I’m hungry. I take papaya, a cup of oats, boiled egg, and dark chocolate drink. At other times, scrambled egg with spinach and tomatoes on toast.

My lunch consists of fish with sidedish and 1 slice mango eaten with rice. If pork or beef or chicken is served for lunch, I wrap it in lettuce with kimchi. My dessert is sweet sampaloc/dark chocolate/peanuts/Hi-Chew and Coke Zero. Take note that some days, I take sweet sampaloc and dark chocolate and peanuts and Hi-Chew and Coke Zero all at the same time for dessert.

When I’m home, my snacks become my early dinner. It consists of pandesal with kesong puti and spanish sardines and fresh carabao milk.The number of pandesal depends on how hungry I am. But usually 1-3 pcs.

At 12 midnight, my son Gio takes his lunchbreak (US based) and we snuggle to watch 1-2 episodes of The Golden Girls together. I normally don’t eat with him but when I do, I take a cup of trail mix with milk.

I am 67 years old, 5’1” tall with vital statistics of 37-29-38 weighing 120 lbs on good days and 124 lbs on bad days. I already quit fantasizing for 115 lbs. but still dreaming to lose 1-2 inches off my waistline  heheheh . . . Instead of killing yourself for a Barbie-like figure, focus on gaining strength, wellness, and endurance. Your world will be more enjoyable!

(For comments/reactions, reach me via Messenger or ndelr62@gmail.com. Stay safe everyone!)

Soulmates Do Exist (Tribute to my Friend D)

Some people wander through life silently wishing to find their soulmates. Some are lucky without even looking while some (yours truly included) never caught one even if they fervently pray for it from dawn til dusk.

D and I first met in Cebu, when I was taking a break from my wayward thesis writing. She was then the apple of my friend’s brother’s eyes with whom I was staying. Anybody can easily fall in love with D. She was beautiful, smart, soft-spoken, kind, well-mannered, hard-working, helpful, honest and caring. Without further ado, we clicked in an instant. Naturally, I flew back to Cebu when they finally decided to tie the knot. I was profoundly honored to be part of their once-in-a-lifetime wedding entourage.

Fastforward to 2002. With Ate Ella and 2 children in tow, we made our Great Escape to Cebu. Unfortunately, my friend and her family were out of the county during that time. D graciously offered their marital house for us. That is when I discovered that D and her husband (my friend’s brother) called it Quits. Strange how we could have the same fate when we practically have opposite personalities. I was shocked beyond words. Unlike me, D was the kind of woman any man would choose in any given moment. On top of her exterior and interior attributes, she is a master chef and baker. 

In the midst of her personal struggles, D made sure that we enjoyed ourselves in Cebu. Thanks to her unconditional love, I have never seen my children as happy as they were there. I swear we could have stayed in Cebu forever but Nanay begged me to return to Las Piñas to take care of Tatay who suddenly couldn’t walk because of our frightening disappearance.

Strong as she is, D moved on with her life and fearlessly migrated to the States. Knowing her, I believed in my heart that things will definitely be better for her there.

Guess what? She is now joyfully and happily married to the man of her dreams and doing her passion—cooking and baking!

I just loovvveeee happy endings. Happiest birthday my dearest friend! With all that you are, you deserve the best. Thank you for being you. I hope someday I get to meet your darling hubby and indulge in your yummy masterpieces there in the US.

Yes, soulmates do exist but I just wonder how God picks the person He will bless it with. Have you found yours?

Still waiting hahahah . . .

(Thanks for dropping by. For comments/reactions, you may reach me via Messenger or ndelr62@gmail.com. Stay safe everyone!)